A Graduation Tribute to my Sister

Hello, world! This post is going to be a little more personal from my other posts because it is a little bit more personal. I just wanted to congratulate the Class of 2015 and hope that all of you take this time of the year to celebrate everything you've accomplished and look forward to the things that life has to offer! 

Love you, and will write to you again soon.

Smile on,

-smilesifyXO

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Eighteen years ago, a 7-pound little Asian girl named Dana was born. At the time, I wasn't yet sure of what to expect from my new sister, but my parents were pretty convinced that we would be best friends...or something like that.

Anyhow, things didn't really go exactly the way my parents planned. Because Dana and I fought over practically everything. Consider Mom's distress when we even argued over which cup was whose--when there were two identical cups, untouched, on the table! There were some days when I would think that Dana was against me for every minute of the day, until playtime came along. I think to some of my play dates and a lot of fights with my friends originated from playtime. We would bicker about who got to wear what costume, who got to be this character, et cetera. Surprisingly and to all of our relief, Dana and I never argued when we played. My time playing with my sister was a sanctuary. It didn't matter who we pretended to be as long as we were pretending together. And it didn't matter if we'd just come out of a spanking from fighting over another stupid thing that kids fight about. When we came together with our imaginations, nothing could stop us unless we were done, or unless if Mom was yelling at us to go to bed already, it's 8pm.

Dana and I went to Shepherd of the Hills Christian School. They say that the second child is the more socially adept one, and our family wasn't an exception to this. I struggled with friendships throughout my whole time in Shepherd, and it wasn't until 8th grade when I finally settled in with a friend group that I could fully relate with and confide in... This is saying something, considering that I'd known most of these kids since Kindergarten. Dana, on the other hand, never had a problem connecting with her peers and making friends. In fact, I can't even call her a social butterfly, because butterflies needed to once be a grubby, awkward-looking caterpillar. Dana cared so much about each person she encountered. People were never afraid to come to her with their problems, and she always did her best to support her friends, even as they dragged her into the middle of their arguments. She's reliable, trustworthy, and understanding, and she never let her friends down. I think that her Confirmation verse, John 8:12, inspires her. Dana recognizes Jesus as the Light of the world, and as a part of being his child, she is a small light herself.

Her caring spirit continued shining when she got to high school. At first, Dana didn't want to go to our high school because I was there, and she didn't want to go through that thing that some teachers tend to do. You know, like, "Oh, Nikki was a great student; I'm going to assume that you're going to be just like her because you're her sister." But after many conversations, our family decided that this school was the best option, because it was close, and because of the AP Program, which Dana excelled in. She has taken so many AP classes: Biology, Chemistry, Government, Literature, Language and Composition, Macroeconomics, European History, U.S. History, Calculus, and Environmental Science. Yep, she's kind of awesome at school. She didn't stop there, though!

In lieu of listing off her whole resume, let's just highlight a few of her accomplishments:

1.       Became the President of Eco Club, which brought some new, efficient lights to the high school.

2.       Was a "fielder" on the Varsity Track & Field team, throwing heavy things very far!

3.       Was a valued part of various honors societies, for academics and musical talents.

4.       Became a Green Belt in Taekwondo. (I don't think that Dana really considers this as one of her major accomplishments, but I am just sayin'.)

Anyway, Dana was really nervous that she wouldn't find her place in high school. Like, so nervous that she didn't want to go there. But now that she's a senior, it is easy to ask any of her friends, teammates, fellow club members, classmates, and teachers if they think she will go far, and none of them would have any doubts!

My sister's accomplishments are pretty cool, but I think that the most important thing she has gained from high school is a sense of self. Dana has encountered so many people in her life already, and while she is optimistic and kind, she is very smart. She has impacted the lives of the people around her with her smile, good advice, and listening ear.

Dana has taught me these things so far:

1.       Age does not equal maturity points.

2.       A listening ear can offer much more comfort than a bucket-load of solid advice.

3.       It is possible to sleep through anything if you set your heart and soul to it.

I am excited to see you in college next semester, Dana. I look forward to continue growing with you and watching you continue to do exciting things. I couldn't have asked for a better sister in Christ.  

LIFE UPDATE: My 2015 Spring Semester

Happy Friday!! Today I was going through some of the lovely comments from past posts that you guys left for me and realized how much I've been neglecting this blog. I was nominated for a lot of wonderful blog awards and would like to do them sometime in the future, but there are so many other things that I want to share with you. I just wanted to give a quick shout-out to the kind readers who recognized Smiles No Matter. I am really grateful for the nominations and will get around to writing those posts when time allows.

• The Blogger Recognition Award from The Life of Little Me
• Stahp You're Too Sweet For Your Own Good Award from Edge of Night
• Stranded on a Desert Island Tag from Sammie the Stargirl
• The Lovely Blog Award from The Life of Little Me

Anyhow, today I'll just be sharing a bit about what I've been up to lately, just so we can catch up and then get rolling with a lot of fresh, inspiration as the school year comes to a close and summer begins!

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So to be honest, this semester was really intense. I had a lot of things to juggle because my jobs suddenly dumped a lot of hours on me. For those of you that don't know, I am working two jobs this semester: I'm a tutor for writing, psychology, and general chemistry, and also work at the front desk of a residence hall. I absolutely love tutoring. I love connecting with my "tutees," watching how they mature and learn, and having the feeling that I have helped someone with something. It's not the perfect job, but it is really nice to do during college.

My desk job, on the other hand, is actually more stressful than what it's worth. I work some crazy night shifts and it was difficult near the middle of the semester because my boss had assigned me many of these shifts on the days I had 8am classes, despite my having discussed my schedule with him/her before this semester. The lack of sleep has just been really draining on me, and I am pretty underpaid and under-appreciated at my job, as are most people who work night jobs.

But, a lot of positives have also come out from having these jobs. Without the work, I wouldn't have met some of the people I know, and sadly I can't deny that making money is becoming more important to me, because it opens up doors for me to do things that I am passionate about. I started sponsoring a child in India through World Vision. I can treat my friends to dinner. I don't really have to worry about not being able to do the things I want to do due to financial issues. Not to mention that taekwondo is an expensive sport when it comes to traveling and entering tournaments.

Speaking of tournaments, taekwondo this semester was geared a lot toward preparing for a major tournament: Collegiate Nationals. I'd have to say that taekwondo has become that part of my life that would cripple me if I were to lose it. This year's competition went amazingly for our team this year! We brought home six medals!! Although I didn't medal in my division, I feel like I have improved so much since I began fighting. I am just so grateful to be more involved with taekwondo, and look forward to training even harder during the upcoming year.

For those of you interested in how the tournament went for me, here is a link to a video that shows my fights and form.

Volunteering has also been going well. I am a part of Alpha Phi Omega, which is a non-Greek, co-ed fraternity that is dedicated to community service. I am currently the Service Co-Chair on the executive board, and have just been getting people excited about doing community service. I started volunteering with the Counseling and Psychological Services as well. I basically promote healthy living and try to destigmatize mental health issues. I have learned so much being a part of it!

Other than that, I would have to say that this semester has been the most challenging academically so far. I am currently taking 16 credit hours; Organic Chemistry II has been kicking my butt, and I've had to really buckle down to study for the last exam before the final. College is not easy! But it is rewarding. I particularly enjoy my English class, which has tons of daily readings (we are reading eight books, plus journal articles and short stories, in four months); the discussions that stem from these readings are so fascinating.

All of the things going on in my life have just consumed a lot of energy. Which is not necessarily a bad thing--I want to live my life to the fullest, and I want to give my all. But it hasn't left a lot of time and inspiration for this blog, and I am very sorry about that. Recently, I've been getting inspired and excited about everything again, so I am looking forward to writing to you more and posting more vlogs!

Thank you for reading all of my updates and thoughts! Sorry if this was a little boring to you; there is just a lot in my life that I want to share with you. How do you think your semester has been? Let me know in the comments!

Smile on,
-smilesifyXO

Taking 2015

Hello everybody! How are you? I feel like it has been ages since I've started writing a fresh new post, but here we are--finally! I really apologize that I haven't written in such a long time, but life just caught up with me. However, I promise that even though I may not be as consistent with posts anymore, I will be here for you. In the meantime, I will do my best to try getting back into star-blogger mode!

Today I just wanted to take the time to catch up with you--two months is such a long time, don't you think? I'll also be sharing one of my main goals for 2015 and sharing a new take on New Year's Resolutions. Enjoy!

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The other night, I met up with a dear friend who said, "I haven't seen you since 2014. Happy New Year!" It was just one of those moments where life sinks in and you start realizing how time has passed and how much you've grown. I choked down this feeling though, doing my best to focus on the moment at hand. The passage of time is surreal to me; it's as if life is pushing onward hastily like a train, but despite that each day is so special and lengthy in its own way.

2014 has been such a year--a great one at that. I've hinted at it a little bit on this blog, but I had some very bad experiences during 2013. So last year was like a period of recovery from the hits that I'd taken, and it was also a period of growth. I moved to a new university where I was challenged academically and as a leader. I also met a very special person.

But what of 2015? Well, I decided that instead of trying to set lofty goals of succeeding at this or accomplishing that (which I usually push myself to do), it is my resolution to be satisfied.

There seems to be a growing concern about the discontentment of our generation. Why? Well, we're constantly looking for more. Just go to school and look around: How many people are on their phones? There is nothing wrong with technology; in fact, I find that my phone, laptop, and Kindle are incredibly helpful when it comes to communicating with friends and family, taking and reviewing notes for school, and of course writing my blog and editing the occasional vlog.

But there seems to be such a dissatisfaction in the now, which is reflected in the obsession of our devices.

We scroll through Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram posts, as if we're looking for more in life. But, does scrolling really fill that void?

On the contrary, perhaps it is the scrolling that creates the void. When we look at all those articles, commentaries, pictures, and memes but don't find any satisfaction in that content, it sets us on the hunt for more. Did you know that the average American checks his/her smartphone 150 times a day?

So, my resolution for 2015 is to do less--technology. Because this will lead to appreciating more!

But I suppose that the resolution isn't really a New Year's Resolution. It's pretty well-established that New Year's Resolutions usually fail. So instead, I will make it a New Day's Resolution. Every day is a new day, a fresh chance to succeed at our goals.

Have a blessed semester and year!

Smile on,
-Riley XO

What to Do When You Don't Know What to Do

Good morning, world! How are you today? I'm doing okay overall. I had a job interview last week and am anxious for the results. I hope that I will be able to get this job as a chemistry tutor this coming fall, but I'm trying to tell myself that God will provide.

This morning's discussion is longer than usual because it's all about purpose--finding the right purpose in your life. A while ago, I had a conversation with a special friend about life. We touched a little bit on purpose, which kind of got the wheels in my head turning. Do you feel like you have purpose in your life?

It's basically the long-term debate in philosophy: looking for the right purpose. Aristotle said our purpose is to live a flourishing life in study. Epictetus believed that our purpose is to live a happy life by caring only about the things that truly matter (which are the things we influence). Mill thought that our purpose is to increase the overall happiness level in the world as much as possible, and reduce the amount of pain. (I often think of Mill as the mathematician of philosophers.)

We have books overflowing with arguments and ideas about how to live life, and these books fill the shelves of thousands of bookstores across the nation.

And yet, there have been times I hit that rut where I don't really know what to do. What is my purpose in life? When are some of the moments in your life when you've asked yourself this question?

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Here, I'm going to share with you my tips on what to do during these times, and also what I believe is my purpose. I pray that what you read will bring you inspiration and optimism as you think about your life.

Firstly, know that it's okay to not be okay. We recently finished a seven-part series studying a book called Sometimes You Win, Sometimes You Learn. An overarching theme in the book is that although winning is lots of fun, many of the most powerful moments in life come from losing. Losing and feeling empty can be precursors to growing and maturing. Life can be represented with a yin-yang. There is the good, the warmth, the happiness, the health. And in that very same symbol, there is the evil, the cold, the pain, the sickness. Both exist together, within each other. The yin cannot exist without the yang. If you accept the wins of life, you must learn to accept the losses too.

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I think that the modern society puts a lot of value in having purpose, in being happy. Society tells us to always answer "good" when we're asked how we are. Naturally, when we don't feel like we have purpose, we tend to feel ashamed, abnormal. But you know what? There's nothing wrong with having a bad day, week, month, or even year! There are many good ones to come. Remember to take the good with the bad.

Secondly, document your thoughts. I have personally experienced so many instances where I suddenly felt overwhelmed by absolutely everything. About a year ago, my cousin gave me this journal. At the time, I was pretty lame at journaling, so I made it my New Year's resolution to write something in it each day. This last January, I purchased another journal because it has been such a helpful tool for me to keep track of the daily thoughts, worries, praises, and events. In journaling, I've improved my time management, and sort of experience this sense of peace as I reflect. I do believe that part of our purpose is to enjoy every day that we're blessed with. One way to start appreciating every day is to write them down.

Thirdly, surround yourself with love. From my experience, the nuclear family has a powerful bond that you can rely on when everything else fails. However, while you can't choose your family, you can choose your friends. There are some people who will encourage you to do things that are against your morals or standards, and when you stumble upon people like this, run away in the opposite direction! Stay with the people who encourage you in the hard times, rejoice with you in your successes, and respect you even during your lowest points in life. Be with people who are also searching for and pursuing their own purposes. What's that saying again? "Birds of a feather flock together."

Fourthly, practice gratitude. Take some time every day to give thanks. While not every day may not be good, there is still good in every day. Find the good in every day.

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And now we arrive at the second part of this post, which is where I will be sharing what I believe my purpose is. As it is evident through this blog, I believe that my purpose is to help people find happiness in their lives. But this purpose is part of a greater purpose. I have come to learn that life's purpose is to love.

I'll have to admit that until about a year ago, I was a half-hearted Christian. I talked the Word, and I thought I knew all about what it meant to be a Christian, but now I realize how wrong I was. The Church says a whole lot about "Believing to get to Heaven." Now, I'm not saying that believing isn't important. It's just that I wasn't guided to know what to believe in.

I was taught that if you believe that Jesus died and rose for you, it was like getting this one-way ticket to Heaven.

While it was acceptable as a child, as I grew older, I had trouble seeing what the point was. To me, it sounded like, "Believe in this story, and this simple story will allow you to escape a hellish void that mankind deserves to remain in after this life." So what if I believed that this guy died for me? People die for people all the time.

Last year, I went through some of the worst experiences in my life. The one person that I thought I could count on didn't just let me down, but came back to make sure that he'd beaten me to the ground. I was later forced to leave my beloved home due to a set of unfortunate circumstances. Christianity as I had known it could get me far, but not through this.

Although the most painful events of my life (so far) happened that year, so did some of the most important lessons.

I learned in a whole new way that God is love. God is also an abstraction. For instance, think of your best friend's name. Now try describing your best friend. Do you notice, that as you continue to describe this person more, there only becomes more information that you left out? Each person that you know is so complex. As you think you start developing relationships with people, the more about these people you discover. Well, the same is true with God. But God is so much greater than people, the abstraction indefinitely more complex. As I learned more about God, the more I realized that God is so much more than a noun describing the omniscient, omnipotent presence that created the world. God is an action. God is love.

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Let's look at the life of Jesus.  A lot that my church did was talk about how much he showed up the Pharisees and the disciples with his wisdom and insight. "How wrong they were. How right he is."

A lot can be said about Christ's theological knowledge. But so much more can be written, studied, and shared about the way he lived. He lived with the people everyone else hated. He shared meals with the poor--and not just volunteered at a soup kitchen--he actually sat down and ate with them, like they'd been friends forever.

A man asked Jesus, "What is the greatest commandment?" And Jesus answered, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself" (Mark 12).

He calmed the storms of people's hearts, healed the dying, comforted the weary. His life was so full of love as he lived the greatest commandments.

And then his death.

I cannot imagine a stronger example of true love than Christ's death.

It's the innocent sacrifice in exchange for the tainted, the lamb to the slaughterhouse. His death was pure. But as I thought about it, I came to realize that Christ did not die only for the people who would eventually come to believe in him a couple thousand years later. He died for all mankind. Even the sinners. Even the people who hated him. Even the people who killed him. He suffered knowing that from these people who tortured and crucified him, he would gain nothing in return. And yet--he still suffered for them.

When I look at Jesus' life, death, and ascension, I see purpose that is not only worth living for, but dying for. And that is why I am inspired by the Word to seek love, and to share it with others.

The beautiful thing about love is that it is shown through small gestures and huge, grand ones. Although I don't think I am capable of doing great things alone, I know that I can do small things with great love. This is how I want to live. Love is what I'll hold on to.

Smile on,
-Riley XO

Mother Teresa Quotes

Good morning all! Hope everything has been going well for you! Today I just needed a break from my own words and wanted to dedicate this post to quick words of wisdom by a woman who holds a lot of my respect. I hope you can pick out one or two from this compilation that you write down and look at for the rest of this week. Enjoy!

Take care,
-Riley XO

Note: All images were found on Google. I do not take any credit for the words or images in this post.

Embrace Your Inner Cog!

Hello! How have you been lately? What's your favorite part of the day so far? Let me know in the comments! Personally, I've been going through ups and downs but lately my heart has been on its journey to being where it will be happiest, and sometimes that's just all a girl really needs to keep trekking on.

And that's a little bit of what I wanted to write about today. I know the title sounds pretty goofy, but sometimes there can be a lot weighing a person down--even the happiest people go through experiences that make life become tedious, difficult, and mundane for a period in time.

I remember at high school graduation, one of the speakers told us that although people often tell us that we are unique, amazing individuals, we must also remember that we are essentially cogs in a machine.

Cogs in a machine? What? Why would anyone want to think of him/herself as something like that? I get what you're thinking; initially, it sounds somewhat depressing to think of oneself as a cog in a machine, probably most likely because it's a bit on the dehumanizing side. It's not very exciting and, well, it's boring. People aren't really boring.  

However, it is essential to embrace your role in the greater purpose. You may feel like an insignificant cog, but without one single cog--even if it's the tiniest one that goes missing--the machine cannot function properly.

One piece gone, and it stops working.
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I sometimes struggle with this concept. There are certain days when life is completely hopeless. Have you ever been in one of those sad moods--without really knowing what's made you sad in the first place? It's on these days when I lose sight of my role in life. I lose sight of my purpose. I feel like a boring little cog, that just spins on and on without seeing much of a point to it. Have you ever felt anything like that?

Well, even though it gets difficult, I try to pray, that God will remind me of my place. I guess you could say that a cog isn't on the same level as the operator, but the operator still cares about each part of the machine. And when the "machine" is the world, my purpose doesn't sound so bad anymore.

So if you're a student, do your absolute best to study hard. If you like playing an instrument or a sport, practice every day. If you're a son or daughter, tell your family you love them. If you have a job, do your best to be kind to the people around you and to do your work well. If you have a dog, take him/her out for a walk. If you like to cook, share a meal with your neighbors. And when you're doing all of this, smile and know that you are living the life that was perfectly handcrafted for you!

It sounds awfully cheesy, but yeah--EMBRACE YOUR INNER COG! Start by having a good rest of your day. :)

Take care,
-Riley XO

P.S. The photo of the cogs that I found reminded me of this song. (Because the cogs are golden.) I find that it puts me in good spirits and relates quite a bit to this post so I hope you like it too!

The Virtue of Happiness

Hello there, how have you been? Last week, I had a philosophical moment in one of my vlogs, which is embedded here below. (It begins toward the end if you wanted to fast forward to there.)

I'm currently taking and introductory ethics course, and my professor describes the content as "learning how to live your life." She is probably one of my favorite professors this semester; she has a cat, loves clean chalk boards, and does her best to be kind to all of her students.

We're currently studying Aristotle, whose Nicomachean Ethics describes living a happy life. How does one define happiness? How is happiness attained? How do we know if a person has achieved living a happy life?

Well, there are many interpretations for the definition of happiness, but Aristotle says that it is essentially living a full life. His term for this sense of a flourishing life is eudimonia.

Although happiness can be attained through many ways, eudimonia is something much more distinctive. Aristotle would argue that humans are unique from all other things of the universe because they are able to practice eudimonia. Plants and animals live and experience pain and pleasure, but only humans can pursue a full life. Humans have a working conscience that sets us apart from the world. This is so important because this is our purpose. Since we are the only ones on Earth that can think intellectually, it is up to us to improve our knowledge constructively.

On Aristotle's terms, we must exercise rational activity in a virtuous manner. Basically, virtuous person will do the right thing at the right time for the right reason and in the right way. Virtue is done for its own sake, and good people exercise virtue for its own sake.

And what is virtuous can be pinpointed through the Doctrine of the Mean. (Mean as in average, not rudeness.)

Take confidence, for example. If you have too much confidence, you're arrogant. But if you don't have enough confidence, you will miss opportunities that you otherwise have the skills to attain. This could apply to nearly every personality trait, and it's unique to each situation or case.

There's something really harmonious about the Doctrine of the Mean. Do you think it's a good way to find happiness? Let me know in the comments below!

Take care,
-Riley XO

Discipleship and Inner Turmoil

Hello there everyone!

Unfortunately I did not have time to film a YouTube video this weekend. My roommate used to travel to visit her boyfriend every weekend, but she just got a job and is now staying in the dorm a lot more, which makes it somewhat awkward to film because I feel guilty disturbing her. NaNoWriMo started five days ago, and I'm getting into the swing slowly but surely (so much writing, ahhh!).

There are also a couple of additional things going on in college that I added onto my palate this week, so I am in the process of adjusting, but I am determined to film a video for next week focusing on the first chapter of The Little Prince.

That being said, I recently wrote something for a Theology class that I wanted to share with you. This is an essay responding to the prompt: 

Based on Mark’s Gospel and EITHER Philippians OR 1 John, what does it mean to be a disciple of Jesus? Please present and explain the connection(s) between Mark’s gospel and the ethical demands of Philippians OR 1 John. Include an assessment of the practical implications of discipleship for Jesus’ followers today, possibly including a reflection on the tension between Christian life and “modern life.”

It was a challenging write for me, but here are the insights that I had. If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to type away at the space below!

Have a wonderful week, and I hope you find this to be valuable or at least interesting.
-Riley XO

Note: the excerpt from Rolheiser is taken from the third chapter his book The Holy Longing. It is a fascinating read if you ever have time to pick up a little something.

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             Some people view the Bible as a manuscript for living. Although the Bible actually encompasses a variety of genres, it is undeniably a helpful tool for discovering God's plans for his disciples. The Gospel of Mark gives a narration of Jesus' life, but also highlights parables that exemplify the image of an upright disciple. First John then builds upon Jesus' commandments, providing further insight regarding the proper lifestyle for disciples, embellishing on the parables in a straightforward manner. An interesting implication arises, however, when both Mark and First John express that disciples will be persecuted by the world for following God. With further examination, turmoil ultimately coincides with discipleship in the modern context.

            In order to understand the meaning of discipleship, it is first necessary to understand the Kingdom of God, which is a common theme throughout the New Testament. From early on in his teachings, Jesus is already proclaiming that "The Kingdom of God is near. Repent and believe the good news!" (New American Bible, Mark 1:15). The concept of the Kingdom of God is developed throughout the New Testament, and essentially comes to define the community of Christians who follow Jesus' teachings and love one another, and the Kingdom of God is spread through Jesus' disciples, as explained by the Great Commission (NAB, Mark 16:15). Perhaps one of the most descriptive parables for discipleship in Mark comes from the Parable of the Sower, in which Jesus explicitly states that "those are they that were sown upon the good ground; such as hear the word, and accept it, and bear fruit, thirtyfold, and sixtyfold, and a hundredfold" (NAB, Mark 4:20).  The soil in this parable is most significant because it predetermines the seeds' success. According to Mark, therefore, disciples of Jesus are nourished with "good soil."

            What is an example of good soil, and what must a disciple do to ensure that s/he is in good soil? Jesus answered this question, saying, "Whoever does not accept the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it" (NAB, Mark 10:15). Accepting a set of beliefs as a child would goes against instinct, especially after a human has developed rhetorical and logical skills with adulthood. To adults, children seem naive and too trusting. However, it is exactly this innocence and acceptance that Jesus values. Children tend to look for good in the world. Rather than looking down at others, they look up because they realize that they are not the strongest, the wealthiest, nor really even capable of surviving on their own. They  listen and learn quickly; their perspectives are malleable, constantly adjusting to new information. Good soil is having such openness of a child, and the plant begins to grow when the seed realizes that it is dependent on God.

            When the seed has taken root and has the nutrients to flourish, it then bears fruit. First John develops discipleship further by explaining what "bearing fruit" is, revealing that "everyone who acts in righteousness is begotten by [God]" (NAB, 1 John 2:29).  A person living righteously can be interpreted to be someone who abides by the Ten Commandments, someone who loves his/her neighbor as him/herself, or someone who follows Christ's example. The last of these would probably be the most suitable interpretation due to the latter part of the verse above. Doesn't it make sense that the disciple following Christ's example is, in a sense, "begotten by God"? Turning again to Mark, it is possible to understand what the correct image of living righteously should be. Jesus showed compassion to the persecuted, healed the sick, and loved the poor. He also taught the people around him to express agape (love) for one another, and empowered the Twelve Disciples to also heal and perform miracles. Therefore, in order for disciples to be considered as "begotten by God," they must also act with this selfless agape. The fruit that disciples bear is essentially the good that ripples out from sharing agape with the Christian and surrounding communities, which is analogous to spreading the Kingdom of God.

            So this rudimentary definition of a disciple of Jesus shaped by Mark and First John is simple, desirable, and straightforward. However, it is a matter of fact that disciples will be hated by the world (NAB, 1 John 3:15). It turns out that discipleship is not as wonderful as it seems, despite the Kingdom of God being the reward. What is it about following Christ's example, that persecution is the result?

            The obvious answer is that in modern life, Jesus' commandments do not coincide with what the world teaches. So naturally, modern disciples are distinctly separate from others. However, it is also important to clarify that persecution comes from the world, and not necessarily other humans. Because disciples are originally born of the flesh before they are "born again" in God, perhaps persecution does come from within the disciples themselves. In order to better conceptualize this abstract idea, Rolheiser establishes that balancing a strong sense of personal integrity, social justice, a peaceful heart, and community with others --all components of being "begotten by God"-- is challenging (Rolheiser 56).  Rolheiser demonstrates with four examples that imbalance is accompanied by personal distress and/or disapproval from both Christians and non-Christians. Disciples must wrestle with inner turmoil trying to attain balance to lead a godly life, a process that is emotionally taxing. And since the great, harmonious, perfect image of God is beyond human capacities, the process of inner turmoil is, in a sense, permanent.

            Being a disciple in the context of Mark and First John presented challenges especially in the early church since Christians were actually physically persecuted. However, such persecution in contemporary life has taken a different form as modern disciples are bombarded with a fast-paced lifestyle that heightens stress and often blurs lines between what is right and wrong. Conflict between disciples and the world, which is integrated both into society and the disciples themselves, makes it a challenge to follow Christ as a child would; however, true disciples of Jesus persevere in order to bear fruit and spread the Kingdom of God.

Making New Friends (For Introverts!)

Hello everybody, I hope you're having a wonderful week as always. I have a super long post in store for you today, so I'm just gonna cut to the chase right away. There is a lot to say on this matter, but I'm writing this with the purpose of providing a starting place for making new friends. This post includes two main parts: The first will hopefully get you to think about how you interact with others and provide some inspiration; the second will have my best tips for breaking out of some of those shells that you may have. And without further ado, let's get started!

A little bit about myself: I don't know if you can tell from this blog or not, but I am actually a pretty introverted person. I mean, I don't get butterflies in my stomach when I think of social interaction, but I do find myself getting overwhelmed fairly quickly while in a group of more than six people. That being said, God did create us to be in the world to interact and enjoy each others' talents, expressions, and company. I think of intoversion and extroversion on a spectrum. I'd say that I'm in the middle, though closer to the introverted side of the scale since I recharge by spending time alone reading or writing. But being with people stirs up a different kind of energy, which is also good in its own way.

Anyhow, there are a lot of times when I feel my shyness getting the better of me, and this post is for anyone who finds his/herself freezing up in certain social situations, or having a hard time making friends. It's okay to be on the quiet or shy side, but it's no good if it gets in the way of you pushing your limit and being surrounded by people who may come to be some of your best friends!

In order to illustrate my point, here is a video by Matthew Hussey that I think you'll find to be interesting:

What do you think? Let me know in the comments!

For me, there are components that I would agree with and ones that I would disagree with.

I would agree that the biggest obstacle that is in your life is usually yourself. Your own perceptions of yourself can really limit your capabilities. For lack of better words, I'll reference David Dark's The Sacredness of Questioning Everything:

The question I'd like to bring to language, my own and everyone else's, is the question of reductionism. Reductionism reigns when the words we use to give account of people and events serve only to reduce, degrade, and devalue human beings... This is a perversity we employ--perhaps it employs us--when we reduce a person to a "just" ("So-and-so is just a...") or a "nothing but" ("You're nothing but a..."), as if we've gotten to the bottom of all they are and will ever be (page 121).

Let's try combine the thoughts expressed by Hussey and Dark to conclude that we should avoid labeling ourselves and other people in order to make new friends, to learn and discover from others. In my experience, the people who really have trouble making friends are labelers--they either put labels on themselves or the people around them.

I personally am more guilty of the former. Have you ever been in a quiet mood? Where there's nothing wrong, but you just didn't feel like talking and wanted to spend time by yourself and think? I get in those moods frequently I recharge by relaxing by myself with a cup of tea or writing, not by meeting and greeting. Yet, when I attributed my quietness to shyness, I stopped making the effort to reach out to others. Because, well, that's just what shy people avoid doing.

I think it's also fair to say that we're all guilty of doing the latter--putting a label on someone else before having met them--one time or another. "Oh, that person seems really stuck-up." Or "It seems like s/he likes sitting alone, so I'll just leave him/her be."

Can you see how these presumptions limit not only ourselves, but the other person too?

Now, I wouldn't go so far as to say that we should shed all labels, though. Adjectives, actions, and experiences make us who we are, and being aware of these help us grow.

Say you're a shy person. Do you want to keep being shy, or do you want to change that? Or say that you're angry person. Do you like being angry all the time, or do you want to change that?  Say you made a mistake in your life. Do you want to be burdened by that forever, or do you want to move on?

What I'm trying to say is: Let words describe you, not define you.

There are also "positive" or "goal" labels. What does a goal label look like? Well, I would like to be labeled as caring, compassionate, empathetic, hardworking, friendly, approachable. Aren't these characteristics that we want to hear when someone is describing us?

Anyway, I wanted to focus on introverts today, so I'll get back to that now. The whole point of the speal above is that you really need to want to get rid of that shyness before you can put yourself out there.

So think about all the things you can gain in life--love, peace, shelter, brotherhood--by challenging yourself to reach out. Then ask yourself if it really is worth being quiet.

With the reflection component of this post over, here are seven tips for getting started with becoming a more outgoing and friendly version of yourself! I hope you find these helpful--if you have any of your own ideas or some feedback, please let me know in the comments!

#1: Force it.
I used to be really shy, guys--practically afraid of talking to anyone I didn't know. If this gives you a proper illustration, I carried a book around with me every day during middle school so that I would have it as an excuse to avoid talking to people during snack break. So when I arrived in college 5 years later, meeting people initially still felt like ripping fingernails out. However, I just had to buckle myself down and approach others, throwing out a name and a smile. It feels really unnatural at first, but if you practice it every day, it starts becoming habit. Don't overcomplicate it. Swallow the anxiety that's churning in your stomach, step out, and ask someone, "Hey, how's your day?" Whether you're in an elevator, sitting in a cafe, or happen to see a person you barely recognize, that's all you really need to get a conversation going.


#2: Join a group activity.

It is so much easier to form connections with people when you already have something in common. So, instead of working out by yourself at home, go running on the track at the gym. Or if you enjoy reading like I do, you could join a book club. It would also be fun to try something new. My experiment was joining tae kwon do, and some of my most influential relationships formed during high school were from the people I met there. (I met my mentor and first boyfriend through the tae kwon do school.)

#3: Invite someone over.
It doesn't even really have to be anything formal like dinner, either. You could just invite someone over to watch some reruns of a TV show you and that other person enjoy. Making that one step usually causes the other person (or group of people) to recognize you more easily and thus forms a stronger connection.

#4: Put some time into your appearance.
I feel somewhat shallow when phrasing it like this, but it actually does pay off to look good. Let's face it: when you look good, you feel good--it's just natural instinct! That being said, there are many ways to improve your appearance. Working out, eating healthy, treating yourself at the mall by buying a new outfit, applying some makeup--all of these are ways to help you look your best and then gain confidence in yourself.

#5: Remember to have some down time.
Putting yourself out there takes a lot of energy and while fun can be pretty draining. I spend my down time in my room, writing, reading daily devotions, and prayer-journaling. Sometimes I do stretches or sit-ups too, and face massages are always a nice treat. Another option would be writing an email to a distant friend, which not only gives you an opportunity to reconnect with someone but reflect on all the things you've been doing. Take some time to recharge by yourself so that you'll be up at your 100% when it comes to meeting new people.

#6: Be informed, and be aware.
Keep up with the news, read blogs (and follow this one!), and listen to NPR every now and then. Also be conscious of the movements happening around you, and pay attention to the conversations you're in. The more you know, the more you'll have to say.

#7: Don't get discouraged.
Let's face it, not everyone is gonna like you. It sounds a little cliche, but haters are gonna hate. Also, you may at first feel like the effort is not worth it if you don't instantly feel a connection with another person that you tried approaching. This shouldn't get you down, though, because once you start meeting more and more people, you'll find the right niche that fits you perfectly, where friends will love you unconditionally. It is a trying process, but just keep up at it and you'll be forming connections and networking in no time!

For some reason, silver linings popped into my mind at this point. So here is one from cauldronsandcupcakes.wordpress.com

So there you have it guys! A nice, long post about making friends if you're an introvert. I hope you found this inspirational and got you fired up and ready to start meeting new people. One last bonus tip: It's only awkward if you make it awkward (you'll know what I'm talking about if you run into one of these situations...and that wasn't meant to sound dirty!).

Thank you for visiting, and please feel free to leave a comment or email me at smilesnomatter@gmail.com! I write a post every Tuesday, so also remember to subscribe to my blog through Bloglovin' or follow me on Twitter so that you'll never miss an update. There are also options to follow Smiles No Matter on the right sidebar (email, RSS, and Google Friend Connect), so just choose what is most convenient for you. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I love blogging!

Take care,
-Riley XO

P.S. I saw the most adorable pug puppy on campus yesterday. She was absolutely adorable and was only two months old--I spent about five minutes petting and talking to her. So here's a quick picture to share some puppy adorableness with you!

Awwwwwww <3
petcollectionworld.com

Now whenever you have a bad day, just think about this warm, cuddly puppy. Smile on.

Never Give Up

Perseverance is a quality that I hold dear to my heart. It has inspired me to get my black belt, go to All State with my violin, and arrive at college. The school year has just started for many of us, so today I wanted to share some inspiration to pursue your passion and follow the path that has been laid down before you.

From Tumblr

The people who've been following my blog for a while have probably already gathered some of the beliefs that I hold dear to my heart, but I'll quickly summarize/reiterate them right now. Class, race, nationality, and gender contribute to who we are, but our sense of self should be based primarily upon our strengths and weaknesses. I do consider people to be on a horizontal plane, in the sense that every one of us has pros and cons. With that said, each person on this Earth has their own unique story, something to share and leave behind.

Passion and perseverance--these two words are powerful on their own, but they are intertwined in order to function properly.

Just think to yourself: Why do I get up every day? Did you answer yourself with a certain relationship, activity, or event? This is your passion. Now ask: Why must I pursue this relationship or do well in this activity? The reasons you come up with are what will inspire you to persevere. Nothing can deter you, because your passions are so much greater than any obstacle.

Of course, finding the answers to these two simple questions is easier said than done. Maybe your passion is finding what your passion in life is supposed to be (this is one of mine right now!). But I suppose that it's mostly about taking a deep breath and knowing that at the end of the day, you will accomplish what you were meant to, even if you're not sure what that is yet.

I don't know guys, I do a lot of self-reflection, so that's what's given me a strong sense of who I am. I encourage you to meditate a little bit, to stop, take a deep breath, and think about passion and perseverance for yourself. Hopefully it'll feel like a breath of fresh air before you start the rest of your life!

Take care,
-Riley XO

Please leave a comment and subscribe if you liked this post! I love hearing your feedback and would like to know what drives you. I've been recovering from a cold and life here is a lot busier here than it was back in Colorado, so my last few posts have been short, but I am hoping to write a nice, long Diary entry fairly soon, just so you guys can have another peek into my life. College has been going well, but there are those bumps and lessons that I would love you to share with you! In the next few weeks, I would also like to share some hair care tips (college version!) and some advice for making new friends from the perspective of an introvert. As always, thank you for reading, and have a wonderful day!

Get Ready for College With Me: Extracurricular Activities

Welcome back to my blog! In the last post of this series Get Ready for College With Me, I talked a bit about taking AP classes, which you can find by clicking here. So today I want to discuss extracurricular activities and give general advice to high schoolers who are juggling several activities or want to be more involved.

Being involved in extracurricular activities is important for getting into college. But the beauty of it is that unlike taking challenging classes and doing well in those (there is a set number of classes offered after all), the choices that are available for these extracurriculars are unlimited.

The options vary because people vary--we have differing passions. So with that in mind, it's important to spend your time doing what you love.

Keeping in mind my advice from the post regarding AP classes and that you should definitely take as many as you can possibly handle, let's put a couple of things into perspective.

There are 24 hours in a day, and the average student requires 7-8 hours in order to function healthily. So if we factor in sleep, breakfast, and dinner, that leaves us with about 15 hours. School lasts for about 7 hours, and homework takes an average of 3. Which leaves us with roughly 5 hours to do whatever we want every day.

What do we do with these 5 hours?

Quick Tip: Count your hours! I often hear people saying that they didn't have enough time to do an important project--but how come these individuals are the only few out of the entire class who doesn't finish the project in the given time frame? Personal problems are sometimes the reason and are acceptable, but those are usually rare. Usually, the problem is that these people haven't put into perspective their time frames and haven't paced themselves properly. You could accomplish a ton in five hours, but it's also the length of two movies, so manage your time wisely.

Well, I made a resume of my high school activities for some college and scholarship applications, and here is a list of a few of the major things I included:

• Community service (through church, hospital, and the library)
• National Honor Society and Tri-M (which is the music honor society)
• Part-time job at a fast food restaurant
• Orchestra
• Tae Kwon Do
• Wrote a blog

My schedule changed constantly. If I happened to have a lot of homework a certain night, I would shave down the time I spent practicing the violin or sometimes had to skip Tae Kwon Do. Or when I started dating, I wrote less so that I could spend more time with him. On a couple of occasions, I had to drop everything in order to cover a shift at work. With orchestra there are chair challenges and concerts. With soccer there are games that may or may not be far away. So how can a teenager successfully handle this fluid, sporadic schedule?

My simple answer: Prioritization.

School always came first for me. If maintaining high grades is important to you, then you should naturally spend more time studying and thoroughly understanding the material. (And high grades are extremely important for anyone who wants to go to college--transcripts are usually the first or second things that college admissions look at--and will also help with landing scholarships.) My schedule every day was for the most part structured around how much homework I would have every night.

Next, since fitness is important to me, I usually locked in the 1.5 hours for Tae Kwon Do. Writing took slight priority over playing the violin, so if I was done with homework I would usually blog upon returning from Tae Kwon Do, practicing during breaks.

Likewise, my advice is to make a list of your activities and set them into levels. What are the things that you cannot live without doing? How much time do you spend on TV or surfing the web? What could you do instead?

Moving off of those thoughts, here are is some advice from my ever-so-eloquent Astronomy teacher: "Get good at something." In other words, don't just be a member that shows up to six different clubs and contributes the bare minimum just to impress college. Rather, invest your time into one or two clubs that actually interest you and use that interest to excel at it. Foster some passion. Run to be a president, VP, secretary, or treasurer of the club.

Do something that you love enough to put in a ton of energy. This is what defines you. If you're an athlete, compete on the varsity team, volunteer in a sports camp for kids during the summer, and support other teams in your school by attending fund raisers. If you're a bookworm, join the lit mag, yearbook, or newspaper staff. If you like experiments, join the Science Olympiad. If you like working with people, do some service, join FBLA, Speech and Debate, or Student Council. If you work, talk to your coworkers and/or customers--care more about them, relate to them. Or if you have an odd hobby and like making crafts, make them and sign up for shows, go to craft shows, maybe even start a business.

The possibilities are endless, and if you use those five hours to the fullest, then you really improve your level of happiness because you are literally living your passion.

So here's a question: What if you don't know what your passion is yet?

To be honest, I was one of those people during my freshman and sophomore years of high school. My best advice is to step out of your comfort zone and try new things. Two years ago, I would never have dreamed of doing tae kwon do, and look at me now--I'll be testing for my black belt in less than two weeks!

Good luck with the rest of high school, and have lots of fun with these years too!

Take care,
-Riley XO

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The next post in this series will include my advice concerning college apps and standardized tests. It will be coming out this Saturday morning, so check it out when you have time! When the series is complete in a week or so, I'll go back to posting little snippets of inspiration--I already have many ideas in store for you guys. Please follow this blog by email, Bloglovin', or RSS so that you can be alerted when new content is posted. I'm also a part of several blogging communities, and the badges can be found on the About page. Thank you for reading, and have a wonderful day!

Submerged in Happiness Day 3: Fruits of the Spirit

Hello everybody! Thank you for joining me on this fun little mini-series. I'm going through some personal things right now, so this post will be short and sweet :)

The fruits of the Spirit are: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

When things are rough, just keep these fruits in mind. Even if they're not easy to come by, they're the healthiest things you can put into your system and share with others.

 

 

 

I'll talk more about this sooner or later, but in the meantime take care and I hope you can live your life to the fullest and give more than you take.

 

-Riley XO



Submerged in Happiness Day One: 5 People

Good morning (or night, wherever you may be)! I follow a page called Quote of the Day on Facebook. They provide some witty lines and amusing quips that are easy to remember, and recently they started adding an artistic element to their quotations. I found this one striking:

 

With it being the last summer of high school and upon turning eighteen a couple weeks ago, I've been spending some precious time with the people who have meant the most to me. So the first thing I thought of when I saw this quotation was my group of best friends that I've been with since grade school. (There are five of us.)

The other night, we put on makeup and prom dresses, snapped way too many pictures, and then slipped into some summer dresses to go to a splendid fondue restaurant. These four girls are such a blessing--I cannot express fully enough how much I love them.

What makes our friendship so strong is that we are accepting. We ultimately love unconditionally despite flaws, distance, or fights. Basically, as a group, we make great memories, support one another, and laugh without end.

I don't believe that we can really choose who we spend the most time with because God has a plan which includes who we end up seeing day in and day out. However, I do agree that the traits of the people who are closest to your heart will influence your actions.

I remember that one of my very dear friends was a pessimist, but the more and more time I spent talking with him, my own heart began to grow darker, more egocentric. During that period, I didn't realize this, but while I was with my other friends I began to notice that this was happening.

So, guys, learn that others' beliefs start to become your own, especially if those people are closest to you.

I thought of two quotations that, when put together with the quote of the day above, form a powerful, powerful message--so powerful that I've written "powerful" four times already!

Firstly, here are the lyrics of a little sing-along piece I learned as Little Riley:

Oh be careful little eyes what you see, oh be careful little eyes what you see. For the Father up above is looking down in love so be careful little eyes what you see.
(It also repeats with "little ears what you hear" and "little lips what you say.")

And secondly, Gandhi's famous words are:

“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”  

It is so important to be wary of what is going into your mind and shaping your beliefs, because that is what becomes a quintessential part of you.

I think that what's most important is submerging yourself with positivity in order to unlock the full potential inside. Love the people who say "It is possible," ones who walk around with a smile, ones who support and see the value inside of you. As you are submerged with people like this, you'll also start to behave prosocially, which is synonymous with leading a fulfilling, happy life.

I'll be hosting a mini-series on this blog this week consisting of three posts that address what sort of things you can submerge yourself in with the goal of smiling no matter.

For Day One today, just take some time to think about who your closest friends are, why you love them, and what you do for each other. Think about your family--all that your parents have taught you, all the camaraderie you share with any siblings or cousins. And finally, take a brief moment to talk to them. Thank them for everything they've been through with you; they have played a vital role in shaping you to be the person you are now, after all.

I'm going to challenge myself and you to thank five people (in addition to family) for shaping the beliefs engrained within my heart and pushing me along the path to where I am today.

Take care!
-Riley XO

Our Lives Are God's

Hello everybody! Happy Monday! Here are two quick quotes for you fellow Christians that are just motivational for getting through the rough times and to cherish the good ones. I'm working on a post right now called 7 Things To Do When You Don't Know What To Do, which will be out tomorrow morning.

Life is God’s initiative and can end or change suddenly, unexpectedly, and unpredictably. When we humans are ready to give up hope and resign ourselves to inevitability, God intervenes and reveals completely new beginnings. The resurrection of Jesus is God’s sign breaking through every form of human fatalism and despair. In every critical event, there is an opportunity for God to act creatively and reveal a deeper truth than what we see on the surface of things. God also can turn around critical incidents and seemingly hopeless situations in our lives and reveal light in darkness.
- Henri Nouwen

God does have a plan, and it gives me a sense of peace when I am reminded of this.

I hope your work week has a wonderful start to it today.
Take care,
-Riley XO

Monsters University

Since my friends and I live on the edge, we went to see the midnight showing of Monsters University last night.

Disney has a dear place in my heart because it basically sums up the entirety of my childhood. I grew up singing "Part of Your World" and "Hakuna Matata," and humming the tunes to Beauty and the Beast or Mulan.

Do any of you have that experience, where you watch something from your childhood and realize that there was so much more to it than you thought all along? Well, for me, this is true. When I see some of the morals, rhetoric, and--let's face it--dirty jokes from Disney movies now that I hadn't realized before, it's like having an epiphany.

Anyway, I don't want to give anything in the movie away, but it is in essence a story of finding your strengths, and persevering despite unreasonable odds.

You know, some people treat life as a gambling game. If the odds of failure are high, we often don't even try. But if it's your dream, why not try? Is life even worth living if you don't pursue your dreams? And don't the risks make achieving those goals even more thrilling?

To me, the movie was ultimately about staying true to yourself (which is a valuable lesson taught in many Disney movies, but one that I am learning constantly).

Monsters University was pretty much the perfect movie for me and my friends to watch though, not necessarily for the entertainment, but for the sentimentality effect. Monsters Inc. came out when I was only seven years old. Mike Wazowski and Sulley were characters that I grew up knowing. It sounds kind of cheesey, but Monsters University was kind of a bridge between my childhood and college, considering the timing and theme.

I absolutely loved watching this movie and would very much like to see it again.

Please do try to get a chance to watch it, and if/when you do, feel free to leave your thoughts on the film in the comments! The blog has a new format from before, so just scroll up and click on the speech bubble at the top right hand corner of the post.

Have a great day!
-Riley XO

Setting Sail

Hello everybody! I found this quotation a while ago, and I hope that it inspires you too on this beautiful Tuesday. It's quite brief, but it holds a lot of meaning, so take the time to digest it. Think about it, meditate on it a little while--what it represents, how it applies to you.

Hope the seas give you good weather today!
-Riley XO

The Meaning of High School Friendships

There are a lot of directions I can take with this topic, so we could probably call this "Part 1."

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My last day of school was Thursday--and let me tell you, it's been one heck of a close. I don't know how naïve this sounds, but I expected to go out the way the kids in that movie High School Musical did: throwing papers, dancing, and singing--having a good time with friends that would always be there with me. Life, however, is a lot more complicated than that. As my friends and I signed each others' yearbooks leaving some sincere, heartfelt notes, there were definitely some mixed emotions.

People have varying ideas of what high school friends are for. I remember sitting with a couple random kids earlier this year during English. One of them said, "To be honest, I don't think I'm ever gonna talk to any of you ever again. For the most part, it'll be like, yeah, it was cool. We had some fun times. But you don't make your real friends 'til college."

To me, it seems like a depressing way to considers one's friends, and my mind was somewhat saddened when I realized that many people believe that high school friendships are just built to be fun for the time-being--temporary. Actually, some people I consider to be very close think that high school relationships are not meant to last and only exist in the now.

I say that it seems depressing to me because I was on the other extreme.

I was determined to keep all of my relationships intact while forging new connections in college. On Thursday after class was over, I talked to my friend Val about staying in touch, referring to my current relationship with Kevin, who was a freshman at Cornell this past year, as sort of a standard.

Kevin had quickly moved on from his time in high school. He'd plunged into a rigorous academic track, registering for 21 credits this last semester. He also joined a project team for engineering, and had a whole new social life to deal with.

As you can probably guess, Kevin didn't have the time to pay attention to everything that happened to me. And my own life had gotten so busy that I still don't really know each detail about Cornell, or even the names of most of his friends. As I scroll through our conversations, most of them are very brief.

But the point of the matter is, we're still here for each other.

When I went through hard times, Kevin knew about them, and offered whatever advice or kindness that he could. And when he was studying for his difficult exams or was stressing out about personal issues, I also did what I could to help.

As I consider my relationship with Kevin, my relationships with my friends from middle school (who I'd say are still some of my absolute best friends), I realize this is true:

So while my friends from high school will be doing many things that I won't be involved in, it's okay. Because I know that I can still count on them when I'm in need, and I'll be there for them whatever they go through.

It's impossible to maintain the friendships the way they are now. However, the experiences in high school aren't meaningless, and neither are the people.

The most important part of your high school friends are the experiences you have together, because these are what help you grow. So the best thing you can do is to thank them for these experiences, and try to keep in touch the way Kevin and I do, the way Val and I will. I've made some valuable friendships these past four years. The best ones are sure to last with a little bit of effort. 

Cherish the memories, and love the people you're with. 

To end on a cheesy note (so I don't drag on forever), here are the lyrics from this little tune I learned from my Girl Scout years:

Make new friends,

But keep the old;

One is silver and the other's gold.

A circle is round,

It has no end--

That's how long we shall all be friends.

Take care,

-Riley XO