Society's Serious Misconception of Pride

Good morning, everybody! Hope everything has been going well for you so far. I actually found this post in some old drafts and thought it'd be a good one to finish for today. In relation to the context I give about my life, it's a little bit outdated, but it is definitely one of those that I really want to finish. I hope you like it!

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I don't know if any of you guys have seen my vlog channel (there's some embarrassing and what I like to believe is funny/entertaining stuff on there), but recently I started doing a 365-Day Bible Reading Plan, which is the highlight of the vlog below:

A special friend and I have started a Bible Reading Journal together to hold each other accountable and to also keep track of our discussions. Reading the Bible has become a part of my routine that I've started looking forward to a lot and I've been getting so much out of meditating on God's word. So if you've thought about reading the whole Bible but never got around to doing so, please check out the video above for a solid reading plan that's been keeping me on track so far!

Anyhow, my friend and I read a section in Isaiah that I just haven't been able to get out of my mind and heart:

"Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight!" (Isaiah 5:20-21, New King James Version)

It's easy to look at these words and think, "Okay, this is sort of melodramatic and Bible-sounding" and go on reading, but if that was mild, the rest of that night's reading took a sharp turn for shocking intensity.

God says to Isaiah the prophet: "Go, and tell this people: 'Keep on hearing, but do not understand; keep on seeing, but do not perceive.' Make the heart of this people dull, and their ears heavy, and shut their eyes; lest they see with their eyes, and hear with their ears, and understand with their heart, and return and be healed" (Isaiah 6:9-10).

Uhhhh, God say what?

This was something that we wrestled with because it shows a side of God that is ostensibly contradictory to what we know about him. But after a bit of research, we see that it's basically a prophecy that foreshadows what'll happen to the prideful.

I feel like this can often conflict with what we're taught in society these days. Society tells us to have pride in our work, pride in our actions, pride in our nation, pride in our kids, pride in our achievements. Especially while in college, as there is so much competition among peers, I've found myself taking pride in my own accomplishments, too.

But, pride is blinding.

If you are proud in your work, how will you be humble enough to try to improve? If you're proud in your achievements, what is truly the motivation behind your actions? If you're prideful in your nation, how do you know if problems are arising, or not being solved?

Pride makes our hearts dull. It closes our ears to that conscience, and shuts our eyes against what is right.

Swallowing that pride is what we need to do before we can truly wise and discerning.

There should be a distinction between pride and love. You can show love through what you do, and you can love doing what you do. 

When I contrast these two things, love is giving your talents to share with others, whereas pride is holding your talents for yourself. Love is everything that pride isn't: patient, kind, pure. Pride is blindness.

Have you ever been in an argument where you've been in the wrong? If you apologized, why did you? (And if you didn't apologize, why didn't you? Haha.) When you apologize, it is admitting that you did something wrong. Really, you're putting your pride aside because you are deciding that your relationship is more important. In a way, when you express apology and/or forgiveness, you're choosing love over pride.

So if you're harboring resentment against somebody, or if there is any tension, think about the causes. Has another person seriously harmed you. Is pride too big for forgiveness?

And I suppose that we can also consider our motivations for doing what we do. Is it to share our talents with others, or to only uplift ourselves? When we are prideful, what else in life are we missing?

Just a bit of food for thought for this week. Please let me know all your reactions and insights in the comments below!

Smile on,
-Riley XO

What it Means to Live in The Now

Good morning, everyone! I am so sorry for being MIA for quite a while--I got swamped with starting a new job and a wave of midterms in literally every class I had (I even had quizzes in my labs and recitations!). Pretty much just adjusting to a crazy schedule and also dealing with being sick and whatnot. How have you been lately? Hope you've been taking care of yourself and finding the blessings of every day!

Anyhow, while I was being super busy during the past weeks, I started thinking about how I live my life.

Has anyone ever asked you the question, "What would you do if today was your last day?" or something along those lines? How differently would you live your life if you knew when you were going to die?

Does it change your perspective? In some ways, it could. It kind of makes you appreciate life more, doesn't it? Well, my argument is going to take on a different perspective today: Why should dying make us appreciate things more?

Don't we know that life is a blessing? There is a tragic tone about dying young, but in all reality, wasn't it better that a person had the chances to experience the beauty of this world--tasting, seeing, running, loving--than never having the chance, ever? 

We are living in a society where things are becoming permanent. The little thoughts that you post on Facebook or Twitter--those are there forever. Technology is also making things more readily accessible to us. If you get a rip in your jacket, you don't have to worry about finding a patch and sewing it on. On the contrary, these days, it's probably easier to go buy an entirely new jacket. When have we had to worry about sustenance? How hard is it to get food? These days, you can even order food without leaving your house! 

Perhaps that's why it's so scary to think about death. There are so many things in our life that are handed to us, that make us feel permanent and secure--carefree. But the definition of life itself is the opposite of this. Life on this earth is temporary. And really, the best parts of life aren't what they show in the magazines or TV. Life isn't about who has the best beach body, who owns the most products from Michael Kors, what car so-and-so drives, or even how talented such-and-such is. It's not how much you'll be making in 20 years, or 10 years, or even 5 years. It's fun to think and talk about such ideas, but if that's all your life consists of, you may be missing the mark.

The best parts of life include: learning new ideas, sharing laughter with a loved one, feeling relieved that your mom's got your back no matter what, experiencing tragedy and triumph, knowing that he loves you back, the assurance that God is there, service to fellow men and women. Each of these is experienced in the now. It doesn't take any planning, experience, or really even skills.

When we realize this--and realize that these cherished parts come every day--how could the thought of dying tomorrow influence the gratitude we have or the choices we make when it really doesn't matter?

Instead of anticipating the future, focus on the now. The only thing that's constant about the now is that it's always changing. And that's what makes life so beautiful. 

Smile on,

-Riley XO

The 7 Real Wonders of the World

Happy Tuesday, everybody! Life has still been full of changes this time of year but whether you're feeling overwhelmed or relaxed, remember to appreciate all the blessings you have in your life!

Remember, you don't have to go anywhere incredibly extraordinary or spectacular to experience the true brilliance of life. In fact, you can take a bit of time to appreciate seven wonders of the world right now!

Louise Hay

That is all I really have today; I just really found this graphic to be inspiring and humbling. Hope your week is full of gratitude, love, and hope.

Smile on,
-Riley XO

Sign of Beauty?

Have you guys ever seen Life is Beautiful? I think that it's one of those classic films that everyone should eventually see since it makes such a powerful statement on happiness, self-sacrifice, and love. (I rarely recommend movies on this blog, so if you're reading this and haven't seen the film yet...there is my nomination for the next movie night!)

Anyhow, I'm thinking about Life is Beautiful this morning because I came across a quotation that I wanted to share with you guys:

I admire the few gifted people who manage to find the best in those around them, and often do my best to be like that. But, I would like to explore this thought a little further.

For instance, the protagonist of the film Life is Beautiful undoubtedly portrays remarkable inner beauty and a noble sense of character, but he isn't actively seeing beauty in others. He is only close to his small inner circle of friends and family. The sign of a beautiful person must then be broader.

People are beautiful if they have a genuine love for others in their hearts. 

Love is a complex thing. (Understatement of the century, right?) I mean, have you ever thought of love as an action? This is one idea that's been around philosophy for a while. Let me illustrate:

Let's say that Person W loves Person X. Every time W sees X, his/her heart starts swelling up with love, and s/he has this wonderful feeling in his/her heart. However, W constantly treats X with a tone of condescension, constantly ignores X's phone calls, and while they're together, W is often dismissive and in general fails to go out of his/her way to do nice things for X. Does W really love X then? Can W be said to be beautiful in her/his "love" for X?

Or, more plainly, if you love somebody but don't really do anything so that the other party knows that you love him/her, do you really love them significantly? 

I've mentioned agape in one of my posts before, but the most basic definition of the term is "pure self gift." One way I think of it is sort of a selfless version of love, one that puts all mankind before the self, or individual. 

So, yes. In order to show love to a person, there is a necessity to put some sort of value into her/him--to see his/her beauty. But, the beautiful person will take it further. The beautiful person not only feels love--the beautiful person does love.

Smile on,

-Riley XO

Be One

Hello! Has life been treating you well? This week's post is a little belated because I've just been getting busy with training for Taekwondo Collegiate Nationals and studying for midterms! I was also elected to be secretary of my pledge class (I joined a non-Greek, co-ed service fraternity called Alpha Phi Omega this semester) and was also trying to figure out my schedule this week.

Buuut at least there is still a post this week, eh? I am hoping to find time to film a video for a future post and the topic is something that has been on my heart for a while, so I will do my best to make it a quality video for you guys. That is one thing to look forward to!

Anyway, today is about kindness and gratitude. I found this picture from emilysquotes.com, and I think that just taking a look at it and basking in its meaning.

I saw this picture early this morning and knew it was something that you would appreciate! 

Guys, I can truly say from as little as 18 years of personal experience that there is a lot of darkness in this world. But it is up to only you if you become a part of this darkness, or if you become something greater. Although this post is pretty short and quick, I hope that it inspires you to go out of your way to do something kind today, or to look for kindness and feel your heart be filled with empathy. (Maybe even both?)

Have a wonderful rest of your Friday!

-Riley XO

The Virtue of Happiness

Hello there, how have you been? Last week, I had a philosophical moment in one of my vlogs, which is embedded here below. (It begins toward the end if you wanted to fast forward to there.)

I'm currently taking and introductory ethics course, and my professor describes the content as "learning how to live your life." She is probably one of my favorite professors this semester; she has a cat, loves clean chalk boards, and does her best to be kind to all of her students.

We're currently studying Aristotle, whose Nicomachean Ethics describes living a happy life. How does one define happiness? How is happiness attained? How do we know if a person has achieved living a happy life?

Well, there are many interpretations for the definition of happiness, but Aristotle says that it is essentially living a full life. His term for this sense of a flourishing life is eudimonia.

Although happiness can be attained through many ways, eudimonia is something much more distinctive. Aristotle would argue that humans are unique from all other things of the universe because they are able to practice eudimonia. Plants and animals live and experience pain and pleasure, but only humans can pursue a full life. Humans have a working conscience that sets us apart from the world. This is so important because this is our purpose. Since we are the only ones on Earth that can think intellectually, it is up to us to improve our knowledge constructively.

On Aristotle's terms, we must exercise rational activity in a virtuous manner. Basically, virtuous person will do the right thing at the right time for the right reason and in the right way. Virtue is done for its own sake, and good people exercise virtue for its own sake.

And what is virtuous can be pinpointed through the Doctrine of the Mean. (Mean as in average, not rudeness.)

Take confidence, for example. If you have too much confidence, you're arrogant. But if you don't have enough confidence, you will miss opportunities that you otherwise have the skills to attain. This could apply to nearly every personality trait, and it's unique to each situation or case.

There's something really harmonious about the Doctrine of the Mean. Do you think it's a good way to find happiness? Let me know in the comments below!

Take care,
-Riley XO

The Examen

Good morning! This post is based on a chapter about the Jesuit Examen from the book A Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything: A Spirituality for Real Life by James Martin. It's a very thought-provoking book that I would encourage you to pick up sometime.

The Examen is a meditation that can be done by Christians and non-Christians alike, but please note that since I did this exercise based on my own perspective (which is a Christian one). However, if you want to try the Examen and are not actively "seeking God," the option is always available too.

With that said, here is a brief reflection on the Examen: talking a little bit about what it is, and how it was beneficial to me. I hope that it will encourage you to also try it for a while and that it will help you find a heightened capacity for gratitude, love, and growth. (What better time to start the process than during the hectic holiday season?) Please let me know your thoughts in the comments below!

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday!
-Riley XO

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Ever since about sophomore year of high school, time became an integral part of surviving the day. School, practice, and lessons begin and end at these specific times; I need to sleep for a certain amount of time; this specific time should be set aside in order to work on a project. Time is necessary for planning a schedule, and schedules are in turn necessary for fitting in everything that needs to be accomplished in the day or week. Juggling the many aspects of life is a struggle for many people, who despite having improved technology find it harder to balance work, play, family, and friends. I for one could not make it without a weekly planner--imagine how many more assets I would have to keep track of in the future when work, and a larger family or friend group are added to the list. When people get in a perpetual cycle of plan, execute, plan, repeat, there comes a problem because soon life loses its spontaneity and therefore vibrancy and wonder as well. How does one preserve the treasures found day to day when life soon becomes reduced to a list of tasks to check off? Well, although it is impossible for us to stop time, it is possible to remove ourselves from time, to stop the perpetual cycle, take a break, and reflect on the magic of daily life that cannot be reflected in a schedule. There are several ways to remove oneself from time, such as through meditation, journaling, or prayer. The Examen is a specific type of daily prayer that allows someone to intrinsically pause time, reflect, and improve his/her mind and spirit; it is therefore encouraged.

 "In the Spiritual Exercises, Ignatius includes a prayer designed to enable believers to find God in their lives" (87). In a life where events, jokes, food, and friends are so tangible, it is easy to lose sight of the supernatural, which, while present, is not always completely in the forefront. The Examen is a prayer or meditation for Christians to realize the presence of God, to help strengthen the definition of an abstract deity. It is done in five steps: gratitude, daily review, sorrow, forgiveness, and grace (97).

Taking these steps allows a person to realize that God is indeed with him/her every day. After I began doing the Examen, I began to take note of the little blessings that had been dismissed before: the warmth of the sun, smiling at other people and seeing them smile back, the little squirrels prancing around campus... Each of these, although a small gesture, creature, or something that is always there, is a creation of God. This reflection has deepened my sense of gratitude for what I have been blessed with. Not just the little things, but especially for friendships, new and old, for attending a wonderful university, for staying in touch with my family, for the opportunities to be involved, and for knowing that I have plenty of food to eat and the chance to exercise. Being aware of these blessings have instilled a sense of contentment with my situation here at Creighton University, which has helped me remove myself from my schedule. Now, while walking to class, I am more aware of what is going on around me instead of being focused on reaching my destination.

Reviewing my day is also extremely helpful because it leads me to realize that my life isn't about finishing these tasks and sitting through hours of meetings. It emphasizes the fact that life is a story. There are highs and lows that make each day unique, therefore significant. It has certainly been beneficial to renew the feelings that I experienced throughout the day and has also made me more aware of others' various perspectives. Experiences play a big part of shaping who we are, and we have the power to influence what is occurring around us, so being aware of what happens each day, along with how certain events precipitated and some of the repercussions that may have arisen as a result, is important to becoming an individual graced with self-awareness.

Sorrow and forgiveness are two elements of the Examen that were more challenging for me. I guess that I have been aware for a while that my primary character faults are impatience and pride or stubbornness. Being reminded of these have helped me develop humility and understanding for others. I realize that my frustration does not help difficult situations, and am not starting to develop more patience and a calmer attitude, channeling the intense nature that comes from within to do something that is productive and good. While recognizing my sins and being able to ask for forgiveness is constructive, it is also slightly frustrating because there is a desire to improve daily, and can at times be difficult to remember that change is a process, and bad habits cannot be eradicated immediately.

Asking for grace for the next day, on the other hand, is a calming experience because it reminds me to live in the present; it also really helped me learn to calm down and enjoy what God has given me now, turning away from any worries of the future. So although I plan and make to-do lists, which are goal and long-term oriented, I have started focusing on what I can currently do to study and prepare, as opposed to fretting over how much a future test will cost. The Examen is a beneficial prayer because it is a removal from the grueling schedule of daily life. It reestablishes what should be valued in life, and stirs an appreciation for creation, love, and morality. It is certainly a positive tool for spirituality and can be used to add flavor and enjoyment. It has helped me refocus my attention on God in the midst of a busy college life and is a commemoration of each day. Martin was right in saying that it is possible to "look back" to find God (98).

Finding the Good In Every Day

Hello there! How has your week been? Personally, my week had its ups and downs, but that's how life goes, isn't it?

thethingswesay.com

On the rocky days, it's easy to let it get you down, but if you look out for the good, it gets brighter. I went to an Enneigram workshop last week, and the presenter brought up this concept that organized a common saying in a really swell way:

1. There are things you can't control.
2. There are things you can influence.
3. There are things you can control.

She then flipped to the next slide.

1. You cannot control others.
2. You can influence situations.
3. The only thing you can really control is yourself.

(On a side-note, if you don't know your Enneigram, there will be more to come in the future...)

Just think about it for a bit. 

What will you make out of your situation and life today?

Take care,

-Riley XO

P.S. 

This post was fairly brief because there are some big midterms looming ahead of me that I really need to focus on. There is a lot of studying to be done! I'll be doing something slightly different this week since I know many of you guys who read this blog are also students whose work loads are also picking up. I'll be making short posts like this one, but twice a week instead of once a week for the next two or three weeks. Please subscribe for that little bit of stress relief during an intense period of time this semester! And good luck with school, work, and everything you set out to accomplish!

Smile on.

Establishing Who Is Right

TGIF! How are you today? Hope everything is going well. Today is going to be a short post because I'm finishing up another project in preparation for my black belt test--but I have started working on a post for Tuesday. I'll be starting a series that will give you a little more insight to my life as I write about the transition from high school to university. I also have some tips for any current high schoolers who plan to go to college, just from teen to teen. So if you have any questions, just send me an email or comment in this post and I'll try to answer them.

I'll be part of a service community in college, and they shared this video. It really spoke to me, and I hope it'll speak to you too.

Being surrounded by people despite differences and learning to be part of a community no matter who is in it...it's just so powerful.

What are your thoughts on this video? Please feel free to comment!

Have a lovely day!
-Riley XO

Submerged in Happiness Day Two: Music

Music. What kind of music do you listen to? Why do you love it? Well, there are many reasons, but here is a nerdy science video explaining a little bit about the neurology that's going on while we listen to music from AsapSCIENCE:

With technology, music is becoming even more prevalent than it has ever been--pretty much an established fact. I was thinking about this a little last night, and I am wondering how certain types of music can affect people's psyche.

If we are submerged in music that is dark, does it affect our personalities, and how?

In other words, is there a difference between people who listen to this type of music:

And this type of music?

(Sorry to shock you with the contrast, haha.)

I personally listen to the former type (plus some Christian rock and a little bit of Alternative), so the latter kind of freaks me out a bit, but I do know several people who constantly have it playing through their earbuds.

These friends are certainly still wonderful people, who are talented, and show kindness to others (which at the end of the day is a good chunk of what's important, right?), but I have noticed a different dynamic between us personality-wise.

Here's a question that I want to pose today: Does type of music affect our personalities, or is it our personalities that affect the kind of music we listen to?

Should we take caution in what we're putting into our minds music-wise, especially now that we can have it playing constantly through our computers, phones, and iPods?

web-savvy-marketing.com

K-LOVE, a radio station I listen to in the car, poses a 30-Day Challenge in which they encourage others to listen only to Christian music for a month, and see how their lives transform. People have given testimonials where they explain how their perspectives on life and relationships are changed due to the uplifting music that this genre provides.

Anyway, I just wanted to encourage a little bit of discussion today as a part of our mini-series called Submerged in Happiness.

What type of music do you listen to, and how does it affect you?

Please comment and subscribe!
-Riley XO

Submerged in Happiness Day One: 5 People

Good morning (or night, wherever you may be)! I follow a page called Quote of the Day on Facebook. They provide some witty lines and amusing quips that are easy to remember, and recently they started adding an artistic element to their quotations. I found this one striking:

 

With it being the last summer of high school and upon turning eighteen a couple weeks ago, I've been spending some precious time with the people who have meant the most to me. So the first thing I thought of when I saw this quotation was my group of best friends that I've been with since grade school. (There are five of us.)

The other night, we put on makeup and prom dresses, snapped way too many pictures, and then slipped into some summer dresses to go to a splendid fondue restaurant. These four girls are such a blessing--I cannot express fully enough how much I love them.

What makes our friendship so strong is that we are accepting. We ultimately love unconditionally despite flaws, distance, or fights. Basically, as a group, we make great memories, support one another, and laugh without end.

I don't believe that we can really choose who we spend the most time with because God has a plan which includes who we end up seeing day in and day out. However, I do agree that the traits of the people who are closest to your heart will influence your actions.

I remember that one of my very dear friends was a pessimist, but the more and more time I spent talking with him, my own heart began to grow darker, more egocentric. During that period, I didn't realize this, but while I was with my other friends I began to notice that this was happening.

So, guys, learn that others' beliefs start to become your own, especially if those people are closest to you.

I thought of two quotations that, when put together with the quote of the day above, form a powerful, powerful message--so powerful that I've written "powerful" four times already!

Firstly, here are the lyrics of a little sing-along piece I learned as Little Riley:

Oh be careful little eyes what you see, oh be careful little eyes what you see. For the Father up above is looking down in love so be careful little eyes what you see.
(It also repeats with "little ears what you hear" and "little lips what you say.")

And secondly, Gandhi's famous words are:

“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”  

It is so important to be wary of what is going into your mind and shaping your beliefs, because that is what becomes a quintessential part of you.

I think that what's most important is submerging yourself with positivity in order to unlock the full potential inside. Love the people who say "It is possible," ones who walk around with a smile, ones who support and see the value inside of you. As you are submerged with people like this, you'll also start to behave prosocially, which is synonymous with leading a fulfilling, happy life.

I'll be hosting a mini-series on this blog this week consisting of three posts that address what sort of things you can submerge yourself in with the goal of smiling no matter.

For Day One today, just take some time to think about who your closest friends are, why you love them, and what you do for each other. Think about your family--all that your parents have taught you, all the camaraderie you share with any siblings or cousins. And finally, take a brief moment to talk to them. Thank them for everything they've been through with you; they have played a vital role in shaping you to be the person you are now, after all.

I'm going to challenge myself and you to thank five people (in addition to family) for shaping the beliefs engrained within my heart and pushing me along the path to where I am today.

Take care!
-Riley XO

Pain Makes You Stronger.

Hi all! Happy Tuesday :) I hope you have a great day today as always!

This post is going to be slightly more intense because it deals a little bit with pain. I heard once that pain, even though it is terrible, can also be a sign that we are human. We have the capacity to feel so much--I think that this range of emotion is a blessing. Although we feel great pain, joy is just as palpable.

But what are we supposed to think during heartbreaking times?

This post will address the matter with a quote/image today and here it is:

Here's a little heart-to-heart moment for you guys. I went through a very rough break-up last month. There were so many dark emotions in my heart. My chest felt like a pot that brewed disappointment, with a sprinkle of pain and a dash of anger. To top it off, my best friend's dog and grandmother passed away. I had to cope with a sense of loss on several different levels.

Guys, I cannot tell you that it is possible to be happy in such times of difficulty and tribulation because I have not yet found the answer. However, it is still possible to smile and see light even if everything else seems dark, and I really hope that following this blog will be able to share a bit of that.

It is important to take care of yourself. Don't let the pain overshadow the good in this world.

This quotation is true only if you let it be.

Pain, tears, and heartbreak happen to everybody, but it is up to you to decide whether to overcome adversity and ultimately become that stronger, braver, and wiser person. Don't let the trials break you, but instead let your strength teach the world a lesson of hope and confidence.

If you're going through a hard time, I hope this provides a little bit of inspiration to help you get through today; if you're not, please remember this for when you do go through a rough patch.

Take care everyone!
-Riley XO

The Meaning of High School Friendships

There are a lot of directions I can take with this topic, so we could probably call this "Part 1."

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My last day of school was Thursday--and let me tell you, it's been one heck of a close. I don't know how naïve this sounds, but I expected to go out the way the kids in that movie High School Musical did: throwing papers, dancing, and singing--having a good time with friends that would always be there with me. Life, however, is a lot more complicated than that. As my friends and I signed each others' yearbooks leaving some sincere, heartfelt notes, there were definitely some mixed emotions.

People have varying ideas of what high school friends are for. I remember sitting with a couple random kids earlier this year during English. One of them said, "To be honest, I don't think I'm ever gonna talk to any of you ever again. For the most part, it'll be like, yeah, it was cool. We had some fun times. But you don't make your real friends 'til college."

To me, it seems like a depressing way to considers one's friends, and my mind was somewhat saddened when I realized that many people believe that high school friendships are just built to be fun for the time-being--temporary. Actually, some people I consider to be very close think that high school relationships are not meant to last and only exist in the now.

I say that it seems depressing to me because I was on the other extreme.

I was determined to keep all of my relationships intact while forging new connections in college. On Thursday after class was over, I talked to my friend Val about staying in touch, referring to my current relationship with Kevin, who was a freshman at Cornell this past year, as sort of a standard.

Kevin had quickly moved on from his time in high school. He'd plunged into a rigorous academic track, registering for 21 credits this last semester. He also joined a project team for engineering, and had a whole new social life to deal with.

As you can probably guess, Kevin didn't have the time to pay attention to everything that happened to me. And my own life had gotten so busy that I still don't really know each detail about Cornell, or even the names of most of his friends. As I scroll through our conversations, most of them are very brief.

But the point of the matter is, we're still here for each other.

When I went through hard times, Kevin knew about them, and offered whatever advice or kindness that he could. And when he was studying for his difficult exams or was stressing out about personal issues, I also did what I could to help.

As I consider my relationship with Kevin, my relationships with my friends from middle school (who I'd say are still some of my absolute best friends), I realize this is true:

So while my friends from high school will be doing many things that I won't be involved in, it's okay. Because I know that I can still count on them when I'm in need, and I'll be there for them whatever they go through.

It's impossible to maintain the friendships the way they are now. However, the experiences in high school aren't meaningless, and neither are the people.

The most important part of your high school friends are the experiences you have together, because these are what help you grow. So the best thing you can do is to thank them for these experiences, and try to keep in touch the way Kevin and I do, the way Val and I will. I've made some valuable friendships these past four years. The best ones are sure to last with a little bit of effort. 

Cherish the memories, and love the people you're with. 

To end on a cheesy note (so I don't drag on forever), here are the lyrics from this little tune I learned from my Girl Scout years:

Make new friends,

But keep the old;

One is silver and the other's gold.

A circle is round,

It has no end--

That's how long we shall all be friends.

Take care,

-Riley XO