July 23, 2015

10 Tips for the First Date

So you've gone with that gut feeling and are going out on a date soon. Whoa! How did that happen, right? First dates are exciting. It's hard to know what to expect, how the other person will be, how your own nerves will be, etc. But--have no fear! Here are ten things (in no particular order) that we can do to help make the experience run as smoothly as it can.

  1. Dress comfortably and nicely. Let's face it, nobody wants to go on a date with someone who doesn't look like they care. So if you have something that's nicer than, say, a T-shirt, that is always a good option. But no need to wear anything so crazy that you're thinking about how tight or loose something is the whole time! Comfort can do wonders to make you feel confident on the first date.
  2. Start off with something active. And by active, I don't mean in the sense of running a marathon. I mean to do something that requires some attention. Like taking a walk along a nice bridge or park, or listening to music, or mini golfing--an activity that will engage you a little bit. This way, if there is a pause in a conversation, it is easy to come up with something new to talk about ("This is a nice view"), and even if there is silence it's not necessarily uncomfortable or awkward because there is stuff out there to draw both people's attention. 
  3. Make eye contact. This one's just a communication tip. Making eye contact shows the other person that you're paying attention to what they're saying, and that you're interested in the conversation. It is an easy way to make a connection with people.
  4. Don't put too much pressure on this date. It is only the first date, after all! Just look at the date as a time to have fun with someone who you want to get to know better. It's only one date that you've agreed to--not a lifetime commitment to a spouse.
  5. Be on time. Show that you value the other's person's time and efforts! This tip may be coming from a Type-A personality, but I must say that a guy who meets me exactly on time--or even plans to arrive a couple minutes ahead of the date--makes a far better impression than the guy who is ten minutes late after I've gone through a whole routine to be ready for him on point. Being on time is an easy way of showing the other person that you respect them and are excited to hang out with them. Of course, things happen, so timeliness isn't a make-or-break deal, but I say it is always good to make an effort.
  6. Sit next to each other. If this date involves food, try getting a booth where you can sit next to each other. This tip sort of depends on your comfort level, but to me, I tend to feel a little self conscious when I'm eating in front of someone who I want to impress. Eating isn't the most attractive thing you could be doing, after all! (I mean, just think about eating a salad... Is there something stuck in my teeth?) So if you sit next to your date, s/he will think, "Oh, they want to sit closer to me. That's cool!" Little do they know...
  7. Have fun! I mentioned this a little bit in Tip #4, but I just wanted to reiterate the having fun part! Either you or the other person put in some effort planning this date, so make the most of the moment by living in it.
  8. Don't be afraid of conversation. And what I mean by this is, don't be afraid to direct conversation one way or another. Some people like going through small talk, others like getting into those real conversations discussing politics, interests, and emotions right away. If you feel like you've only been having small talk and haven't learned more about the other person, just ask a question that steers the conversation toward something deeper. On the other hand, if your date is talking on and on and on about something s/he really loves but you have heard enough about it, don't be afraid to (politely) shift topics and find different connections by saying something to the effect of, "That is awesome. I kind of feel the same way when I do..." or ask a question that mildly redirects, like "Why do you like doing _____?" or "When did you start doing _____?" Hopefully, this will get the conversation to get flowing naturally if it isn't already!
  9. Have confidence. Did you know that confidence is one of the most attractive qualities in a human being? You have a lot of things to be confident about, whether it's who you are, what you do, where you've been. So don't go into the date thinking, "Oh, if I mess up, they're not going to like me anymore." Think positively and smile!
  10. Be yoself! This is a really cliché one but it is absolutely true! There is a reason why you're going on a date with this person--it's because they see something attractive about you (regardless about if you were the one asking or asked).  Be happy with who you are as a person because you were wonderfully and fearfully made. Take it from somebody who's seen it happen firsthand: You will avoid many problems in the future by simply doing what comes naturally to you. So, be honest with yourself and your date.
Good luck with that first date! And as always, smile on.


  1. Great tips for a first date, going to remember these!

  2. I agree.. it's important to show some effort and respect to your date. Have fun, and be yourself. I'll use these someday.. Maybe. Thanks for this! :)

    1. I'm glad you liked some of them! Haha, hopefully things will just come naturally :)

    2. I adored this post, such wonderful tips :)


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