Spending Time Alone

Happy Tuesday, everyone! I feel like it's been ages since I last wrote to you. There have just been a lot of exciting things going on in my life, which I will probably share with you sometime in the future. Have you ever had one of those weeks? Let me know in the comments!

Today, I wanted to discuss something that has been on my heart and that is that, there is a lot of value in spending time with other people.

My friends may or may not agree, but I would personally consider myself to be introverted. I usually recharge by being on my own, am practically silent in new crowds, and prefer to listen to others' stories over sharing mine--but even I get caught up texting people all the time, running here and there to meet with different people, doing my best to make good first impressions... Living on a college campus kind of forces you to be extroverted to some extent. But as I thought about it further, I began to notice a sense of fear--anxiety--growing inside of me. This fear is of being alone. 

It's kind of scary to admit your own fears over the Internet, but yes. I've grown to be afraid of being alone. Of sitting alone at the dining hall for dinner, of standing in an elevator without looking like I have something to do or someone to text, of going to a community service event that nobody else will show up to, etc. Whatever it is, it's like there's this pressure to be with somebody all the time. 

Loneliness, especially among my generation, is starting to look like a really bad thing. A thing that must be avoided at all times, or else everybody will think of you as some sort of social misfit. 

What ever happened to solidarity? Meditation? 

Consider the Transcendentalists, Romantics, Jesuits, Monks! These guys would go on lone retreats to mountains, lakes, forests, deserts, and temples just to meditate, to get away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

Being alone isn't something so bad--there are some true pleasures of being alone. 

You start realizing the beauty in everything. In nature, in your space, in other people, and (perhaps most importantly) in yourself. 

Enjoy spending some time resting and relaxing, even if it happens to only be for a couple minutes. Love yourself a bit! 

What are some benefits you see in spending time alone? Please do share in the comments!

Smile on,

-Riley XO

The Examen

Good morning! This post is based on a chapter about the Jesuit Examen from the book A Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything: A Spirituality for Real Life by James Martin. It's a very thought-provoking book that I would encourage you to pick up sometime.

The Examen is a meditation that can be done by Christians and non-Christians alike, but please note that since I did this exercise based on my own perspective (which is a Christian one). However, if you want to try the Examen and are not actively "seeking God," the option is always available too.

With that said, here is a brief reflection on the Examen: talking a little bit about what it is, and how it was beneficial to me. I hope that it will encourage you to also try it for a while and that it will help you find a heightened capacity for gratitude, love, and growth. (What better time to start the process than during the hectic holiday season?) Please let me know your thoughts in the comments below!

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday!
-Riley XO

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Ever since about sophomore year of high school, time became an integral part of surviving the day. School, practice, and lessons begin and end at these specific times; I need to sleep for a certain amount of time; this specific time should be set aside in order to work on a project. Time is necessary for planning a schedule, and schedules are in turn necessary for fitting in everything that needs to be accomplished in the day or week. Juggling the many aspects of life is a struggle for many people, who despite having improved technology find it harder to balance work, play, family, and friends. I for one could not make it without a weekly planner--imagine how many more assets I would have to keep track of in the future when work, and a larger family or friend group are added to the list. When people get in a perpetual cycle of plan, execute, plan, repeat, there comes a problem because soon life loses its spontaneity and therefore vibrancy and wonder as well. How does one preserve the treasures found day to day when life soon becomes reduced to a list of tasks to check off? Well, although it is impossible for us to stop time, it is possible to remove ourselves from time, to stop the perpetual cycle, take a break, and reflect on the magic of daily life that cannot be reflected in a schedule. There are several ways to remove oneself from time, such as through meditation, journaling, or prayer. The Examen is a specific type of daily prayer that allows someone to intrinsically pause time, reflect, and improve his/her mind and spirit; it is therefore encouraged.

 "In the Spiritual Exercises, Ignatius includes a prayer designed to enable believers to find God in their lives" (87). In a life where events, jokes, food, and friends are so tangible, it is easy to lose sight of the supernatural, which, while present, is not always completely in the forefront. The Examen is a prayer or meditation for Christians to realize the presence of God, to help strengthen the definition of an abstract deity. It is done in five steps: gratitude, daily review, sorrow, forgiveness, and grace (97).

Taking these steps allows a person to realize that God is indeed with him/her every day. After I began doing the Examen, I began to take note of the little blessings that had been dismissed before: the warmth of the sun, smiling at other people and seeing them smile back, the little squirrels prancing around campus... Each of these, although a small gesture, creature, or something that is always there, is a creation of God. This reflection has deepened my sense of gratitude for what I have been blessed with. Not just the little things, but especially for friendships, new and old, for attending a wonderful university, for staying in touch with my family, for the opportunities to be involved, and for knowing that I have plenty of food to eat and the chance to exercise. Being aware of these blessings have instilled a sense of contentment with my situation here at Creighton University, which has helped me remove myself from my schedule. Now, while walking to class, I am more aware of what is going on around me instead of being focused on reaching my destination.

Reviewing my day is also extremely helpful because it leads me to realize that my life isn't about finishing these tasks and sitting through hours of meetings. It emphasizes the fact that life is a story. There are highs and lows that make each day unique, therefore significant. It has certainly been beneficial to renew the feelings that I experienced throughout the day and has also made me more aware of others' various perspectives. Experiences play a big part of shaping who we are, and we have the power to influence what is occurring around us, so being aware of what happens each day, along with how certain events precipitated and some of the repercussions that may have arisen as a result, is important to becoming an individual graced with self-awareness.

Sorrow and forgiveness are two elements of the Examen that were more challenging for me. I guess that I have been aware for a while that my primary character faults are impatience and pride or stubbornness. Being reminded of these have helped me develop humility and understanding for others. I realize that my frustration does not help difficult situations, and am not starting to develop more patience and a calmer attitude, channeling the intense nature that comes from within to do something that is productive and good. While recognizing my sins and being able to ask for forgiveness is constructive, it is also slightly frustrating because there is a desire to improve daily, and can at times be difficult to remember that change is a process, and bad habits cannot be eradicated immediately.

Asking for grace for the next day, on the other hand, is a calming experience because it reminds me to live in the present; it also really helped me learn to calm down and enjoy what God has given me now, turning away from any worries of the future. So although I plan and make to-do lists, which are goal and long-term oriented, I have started focusing on what I can currently do to study and prepare, as opposed to fretting over how much a future test will cost. The Examen is a beneficial prayer because it is a removal from the grueling schedule of daily life. It reestablishes what should be valued in life, and stirs an appreciation for creation, love, and morality. It is certainly a positive tool for spirituality and can be used to add flavor and enjoyment. It has helped me refocus my attention on God in the midst of a busy college life and is a commemoration of each day. Martin was right in saying that it is possible to "look back" to find God (98).

7 Things To Do When You Don't Know What To Do

Hello everybody! Fancy seeing you here again. Have you ever had a day off and just wanted to spend it by yourself? Alone time is great--it can be so relaxing and spiritual if spent well. But sometimes I find that when I have such "alone time," I end up sitting in front of the TV for a few hours too long. It almost inspires a sense of guilt in me, because watching TV stimulates even less of your brain than sleep does! While it's a nice break every-so-often, it's not an ideal way to spend a lot of time doing, right?

Well, here is a brainstorm of quick, doable ideas that you can use if you're bored and would like to spice up your day. Enjoy!

1. Call up an old friend. Remember those good ol' days in high school (or middle school, depending on your age)? Well, contact your friends! Just talk to them, ask them what they've been up to, wish them a good day. Maybe you could even schedule a fun time with a couple of these friends to reconnect. Here is a quick list of 8 things you could do!
2. Lose yourself with a pen and paper. Okay, this one's easy for me to say because I love writing and try to do it every day. Writing is cathartic. It helps you sort through your thoughts, channel emotions, and gets those juices in your head flowing. I recommend writing a journal entry, poem, or short story. But if writing isn't your "thing," you could always try drawing something too. :)
3. Go for a walk. Just be one with your environment. Enjoy the sky, the grass, and buildings around you. If you happen to have a dog, walks are all the more fun--Blizzard (my little doggie) loves going to the park, and seeing him that happy brightens my day.
4. Start a 30-Day Challenge. Not a bad way to fill up some of that spare time. Watch this video for a bit of inspiration to start a new habit or end a bad one:
   
   
   
5. Try a work-out challenge. I have been trying to conquer the "Abs on Fire" workout by Blogilates. My results are embarrassing (mostly consists of me rolling around the floor in pain while she continues on her happy way), so that's why I like to do this on my own.
6. Learn something new. Watch a couple videos on iTunes U (right now I'm watching a series of lectures on personal finance...boring, but helpful), or I also like Vsauce on YouTube for little interesting tidbits.
7. Treat yourself. Go out and buy some frozen yogurt or try a simple new recipe that's sweet and delicious. Here's a bit from Blogilates again:

So there is a simple list of possible activities you can do when you are completely at a loss. If you have any fun ideas, please feel free to share by clicking on the comment bubble at the top of this post!

Have a great day, and take care!
-Riley XO